“When I talked to people with depression — specifically major depressive disorder(MDD) — I started noticing my depression was different. They seemed to almost always to be in a varying state of depression, and mine would cycle on and off. I was either depressed or I wasn’t. Cycling like this doesn’t mean you’re bipolar, but it was my first clue something was different.
Then, one day, I was in a low depression and completely flipped — ‘overcorrected’ — into hypomania over the course of an hour. I had been keen on watching my moods, and I immediately knew what was going on. Over the course of that hypomanic period, I had classic and recognizable symptoms. When in that state, I asked my wife if she remembers me being like that before, and she said yes, many years ago.
Even though I’m in denial sometimes, it’s hard to not see the obvious. The only thing that gives me reservations is my relatively short cycles of depression and hypomania. I can’t directly compare myself to many others for validation.” — Spencer B.